Sometimes the hardest TRUE Strength is honesty.
And the chart topper is honesty with yourself. It’s amazing to me how easy it is to lie to ourselves and convince ourselves what we want to see as reality.
My lie… the reality that my disordered thinking and tendencies have started to resurface. In my experience, and I don’t dare speak for everyone, the harshest reality as a person who has battled eating disorders or disordered thinking is that it never really goes away or is officially treated. It’s my addiction. Compared to someone’s alcohol or drug addiction. As odd as it sounds… restricting, over exercising, controlling is comforting to me. The scariest part for me is that my disordered thinking comes under the veil or cloak of doing something healthy. It just goes too far. It’s enticing… alluring even. Always under the best of intentions… and then slips.
It’s very easy to say there’s nothing wrong or I’m all under control.
But the TRUE Strength reality is … honesty is harsh… and it’s time to get honest.
My friend, Meggie is someone I really look up to. She is brutally honest and open about her struggles and as a recent first time mom has been experiencing all the amazing ups and downs and blurred reality of newborn life. All while still being honest about these ever present disordered thoughts. Her article about Orthorexia encouraged me to seek more guidance and to acknowledge I may be loosing control and need to be more honest with myself.
Meggie writes for Saltyrunning.com. You can read her full article HERE.
Perhaps, such an honest post is not all that fun to read… but, if it can encourage even one person to get some help, it is vital. Thank you for sharing your TRUE Strength with me.